Women are beautiful. Babies are beautiful. A woman breastfeeding her baby is beautiful, but as Naomi Wolf in The Beauty Myth points out, “Beauty evokes harassment…but it looks through men’s eyes when deciding what provokes it “(p. 45). Ah yes, the looking glass of patriarchal society through which we see reflected general society’s feelings about breastfeeding.
When a woman dresses up, whether it is for work or to go out, she usually wants to feel pretty. In contemporary culture, “pretty” generally equals “sexy.” High heels, little dresses, make up, stockings, and low cut blouses. These are the norm in today’s woman’s fashion industry. Notice that these are not things that men wear. I do not think it is too off the cuff to suggest that the fashion industry makes women’s clothing in a way purposely to show off her curves and accentuate her other womanly attributes. Most of us women are pretty okay with these fashion standards, unless religious or other personal beliefs cause us to dress more conservatively, and so mainstream society wears the latest sexy fashions and a trend towards modesty is going nowhere fast.
When a separate industry in today’s existing culture, takes the stance that breastfeeding is obscene I feel angry. Angry and annoyed beyond belief that in a culture that purposely perpetuates the image of women as sex objects, these women are now unable to escape that branding when breastfeeding their child, one of the most down to earth, natural, non-sexy, fashion-less things out there. Then these women get blamed for choosing to expose themselves to public viewing. And it becomes more about a woman wanting to show off her body than about feeding her baby. This is ridiculous!
If a woman wants to show off her body she can wear a bikini top and show off the cleavage of her newly paid-for breasts. She can pout her lips, stick out her bottom and bend forward towards the camera in a tight-fitting halter top. She can flash her boobs on a beach in Florida for college guys on Spring Break. These images get celebrated as women doing something that may be a little scandalous but is still in line of what is invited of, indeed perhaps even expected of a woman. The objectification of women has become the norm. So much so that women unwittingly allow it. The sexy woman is so much a part of our culture that women embrace her too.
And now society can’t tell the difference between the non-sexual breasts for feeding a baby and the sexual breast used to titillate men. Either way women lose. You’re a trollop if you want to feel pretty and dress sexy and you’re repugnant if you nurse your baby in public and someone sees a little bit of flesh. Women get harassed for using their breasts for any function unless it is behind closed doors. You’d think this would be enough to force us back into high-necked blouses and thick floor-length skirts, but it turns out we still live in a patriarchal society and we still care about meeting a man’s definition of what is beautiful.
What are your thoughts? Do you think society perpetuates a double standard when popular culture encourages us to dress sexy and show some cleavage but not expose even an inch of flesh when we’re breastfeeding? Share your views by leaving a comment.
Related posts:
- Monday Musings: A History of the Breast
- The One Thing I Dislike About Breastfeeding
- Monday Musings: Changing Culture
- Monday Musings: Do Public Breastfeeding Moms Nurse Longer?
Tags: society
As a woman who has been in the fashion industry for 15 years. I see this in action. From magazine covers with naked women and men in dark suits to brides wanting their dresses to show “clevage”. Yes, women are overly sexualized and we are letting it happen as we as perpetuating it. In how we judge other women, how we shop and how we go about getting a mate. While breastfeeding in public is seen as disgusting, shocking and often relegated to restrooms. Would you eat a meal in a public restroom? Would a man?
I completely agree. The most recent incident is with Angelina Jolie. The father of her babies took beautiful pictures of her breastfeeding. So many people spoke that it was gross and not something that needed shared with the public, even though not a speck of breast was showing. Yet she shows up to the SAG awards wearing a dress backwards purposefully (moving the slit to show off her back rather than her front side) and she got made fun of for looking too “matronly” and not showing enough skin!
I feel bad for celebrities sometimes. They just can’t win! I think Angelina is a great role model for young women thinking about breastfeeding. She’s pretty, she’s cool, she’s married to Brad Pitt, she does good work in the world outside of her films and she breastfeeds…for media use. Hooray!