It’s the day after Easter. My kids are dragging from the sugar overload and crash effect and I’m contemplating eating the rest of their candy so we can be done with it because yesterday was such a zoo of moody temper tantrums all I wanted to do was to shut myself up in a closet with a bottle of wine. No glass required. I was ready to swig it out of the bottle. But alas, we don’t keep wine in the house unless it’s a special occasion, and even when I imbibe, I can only handle one glass. Make that half a glass. I’m more than tipsy after 4 oz. Yes, it’s true. I’m a cheap date!
I notice on Twitter that there are alot of comments these days that sounds like this: “Can’t go out tonight. I’m not drinking because I’m nursing,” and “I’ve given up coffee while I’m breastfeeding.” While these are admirable things to do, I don’t think they are necessary. Do other breastfeeding moms know it’s okay to have a little, or do they just not want to? I think people get being pregnant mixed up with breastfeeding, as far as what you can and cannot put into your body. Yes, it is important to eat well and stay away from harmful substances when you are breastfeeding. I would go so far as to say it is especially important to at least take into consideration during the first six months when babies are most sensitive. But breastfeeding moms can drink coffee in moderation and they can have an occasional glass of wine. Moms who smoke are advised to quit or cut down as much as possible, but to breastfeed because it is still better than not breastfeeding. Babies born to moms who smoke are at greater risk of developing respiratory illness, but those babies who are breastfed will have less.
Let it be known that there is a big difference to your baby between moderate drinking and excessive drinking. That new gadget that reads a breastfeeding mom’s alcohol level and tells her when it’s safe to breastfeed again, in my opinion is a useless waste of time unless you’re a party mama who drinks a lot and often. And while it might make a mom feel like she’s being responsible testing her alcohol level, it’s not responsible to not nurse when your baby is hungry but you have to wait to feed him or her until your gadget says it’s okay. If you have to wait for a gadget to give you the go ahead, you’re weren’t being responsible in the first place! And supplementing with formula when you’re too loaded to breastfeed isn’t responsible either.
Please check out the provided links for more information on drinking coffee or alcohol or smoking while breastfeeding. This is a controversial subject and while there are scientific studies to back up allowing these practices in moderation, not everyone feels comfortable with putting unhealthy substances in their bodies when they are nursing. And obviously there is nothing wrong with this. Staying away from anything that is unhealthy is something I fervently applaud. But if a mom doesn’t treat herself once in awhile, and in the process feels like she’s missing out and feels resentful, then I’m here to tell you – it’s okay! A morning coffee or one beer or a glass of wine won’t hurt your baby. Really.
*Disclaimer: While I wish everyone took responsibility for their own actions, this is not always the case. Therefore, let it be known that I am not a doctor and will not accept responsibility for outcomes related to poor decision-making. Before doing anything you aren’t sure about, please talk to your health care provider. And if you do choose to drink alcohol, please do so responsibly. Also, parents who have been drinking alcohol are advised not to bed-share as this has been known to contribute to SIDS. Again, please read the links I have provided for more information on this subject.
We all have different levels of comfort around this subject. So where do you stand? Please let me know by leaving a comment. And if you liked this post please consider subscribing by RSS or email. It would make my day!
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I’ve been nursing my daughter for almost 13 months, and I’ve always been very relaxed about what I eat/drink. She’s never had a drop of formula and she is one of the healthiest babies I’ve ever seen! Hits all her milestones ahead of target. And since the day after she was born, I’ve had coffee every day, a glass of wine most nights, and probably a little too much junk food. I do try to avoid pesticides and load up on Omega-3′s (I even take a supplement designed for nursing mothers), but that’s it. Being uptight about your nursing diet will just make it that much harder to breastfeed, which is NOT what babies need!!
I have always been pretty relaxed when it comes to what I eat and drink. I have a cup of coffee every morning and do enjoy a glass or two of wine occasionally. I limited myself so strictly on my first go around with nursing and I was miserable and couldn’t wait to be done. The second time, after my failure, I was much more researched. Much more educated. You can have your body back for the most part and still have a healthy nursing relationship!
Rachael’s last blog post..Top 5 tips for successful breastfeeding before baby comes
I completely agree with what you wrote and I will be partaking in a glass of wine occasionally whenever I am breastfeeding. I am definitely on the side of relaxed when it comes to this.
I’m going on 11 months nursing, and I’m not at all anal about what I eat. I do try to limit my caffeine intake to less than a pot a day though (:-) I also stay away from alcohol simply because it seems like more work than it’s worth to monitor what I’m taking in, and then stress about whether it was too much. I had a bit of a cosmo when baby was 3 weeks old and I spent the rest of the night watching him sleep because I was convinced I’d gotten him drunk. He was sleeping just a bit too soundly for my taste. I don’t need alcohol badly enough to put myself through the anxiety. I’m not a big drinker anyway. 1/4 of a glass of wine and I’m relaxed enough to tell strangers I love them. Like you said – I’m a cheap date. I’ve also read that alcohol interferes with let-down, so that’s just another thing I’d have to stress about.
But as far as diet goes, I eat exactly the same way I always did – meaning: whatever I want. And my perfectly healthy, 24 lb 11 mo. old seems to be thriving off my diet, so I guess we’re just fint.
TheFeministBreeder’s last blog post..Motherhood, Career, and Feelings of Worthlessness
I’m so ready for an occasional glass of wine! And maybe even a cup of coffee. I’ve had a strong aversion to coffee since getting pregnant, and I kind of miss it – except I still don’t really enjoy it when I try little tastes of it now.
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I had a glass of wine at both Friday & Sunday’s Easter dinners. It goes STRAIGHT to my head these days, so one is all I take. I also try not to drink any caffeine after noon, but if I do… oh well, the world isn’t going to end.
I am strict because my children have severe enough allergies that even the amount passed through my milk affects them (eg. eggs). Other than that (ie. alcohol) I am not strict at all.
I hear what you are sying and I know its right but I am a neurotic mother. I cut out alcohol completely and switched to decaf tea when I was pregnant and am continuing that while nursing. I also take a herbal supplement (goat’s rue), a multi-vitamin, pre and probiotic drinks, I avoid peanuts and eat two bowls of porridge (oatmeal in the US I believe) as well as trying to eat generally a bit healthy. I had a really bad time starting out, lots of bad advice from various professionals and my baby wasn’t gaining as much weight as he should have and so I have been trying everything I can to get breastfeeding to work. He’s now doing so much better, gaining about a pound every 4 weeks and I’m scared to stop in case any of them were the clincher.
I am not much of a drinker in the first place, and I also don’t drink coffee or smoke. I do have the occasional cup of caffeinated tea, and I eat a lot of chocolate. I wouldn’t say I change my lifestyle at all while I’m nursing, I’m just pretty straitlaced at the best of times.
Although I will admit I do experience some social pressure. I might have had a small glass of wine at Easter, but drinking and then nursing in front of my in-laws is beyond my comfort zone. But like I said it’s a pretty minor concession on my part, and I would never suggest that someone else should make the same choices.
Amber’s last blog post..Paternity Leave
I am always striving to have a healthier eating lifestyle. I have been pretty much breastfeeding and or pregnant straight for almost 4 years. But even if I wasn’t pregnant or nursing I would still try to be careful about what I eat or drink.
Melissa’s last blog post..ER Easter
I have few qualms about what I drink and eat while breastfeeding, though I’m VERY careful about my drug intake (OTC meds). I think that causes more concern for me than a couple cups of coffee or a few glasses of wine. I’ve learned a lot over the past 10 months of breastfeeding and am pretty confident about keeping myself happy and my daughter healthy in the process.
great article. I am a relaxed mom and definitely enjoy my share of coffee and wine while nursing my boys for the past 4 years.
I don’t drink alcohol, coffee, or tea even when not pregnant or nursing. I am aware that the science shows that it is not harmful to partake of a little of these things, but I still disagree with it. Taking an aspirin for a headache is one thing, but drinking alcohol for fun is another. I just think all harmful substances should be avoided (even sodas!) when pg or nursing. I understand that is too restrictive for most, but it works for me.
Emily Jones’s last blog post..Monday Munchies
Here in the UK we’re even – gasp! – allowed to drink coffee and alcohol when pregnant. Certainly when breastfeeding it wouldn’t even occur to me that I wouldn’t be allowed to!
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I am so glad that I’m surrounded by relaxed mothers where I am. Everyone I know has had the occasional (or even daily) drink while breastfeeding, without stressing about it.
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I’ve nursed my fair share of munchkins and each time, I tried to eat the best I was capable of. I had nurslings who were sensitive to certain things I ate or drank, and avoided those foods/beverages on purpose. I didnt sacrifice a treat or a glass (or two) or wine or beer because I was *NURSING*. I think a woman’s body weight and metabolism should be considered when imbibing, as well as the infants’ age and weight, as well as the frequency of nursing. That’s just a little too techie for most tho. There are a lot of factors to consider regarding the mom’s ability to maintain a good diet, but adequate hydration and rest are really important. Oh geez..i’m getting carried away. Stepping off the soapbox!
Oh, that reminded me – I am super DUPER anal about the medications I take while BF-ing/pregnant.
My second son was having trouble gaining weight. At 2 weeks old, he still hadn’t regained his birth weight yet, so the doctors started pushing me to formula feed. I did NOT NOT NOT want to do that because that is exactly what sabotaged my breastfeeding efforts the first time. So, I searched and searched for an answer to why in the world my son wasn’t gaining weight, despite my enormous supply, and I discovered that Zoloft (and other antidepressants) can cause slow weight gain in breastfed babies. Welp! I ditched the Zoloft (didn’t feel like I needed it anyway after I got my VBAC, the cesarean depression is what was weighing me down) and within one week of being off the meds my boy put on a WHOLE POUND! He’s now a 24.5 lb 11 month old. No weight issues here!
So, thankyouverymuch you stupid a-hole doctors – for NOT telling me that the drugs I was taking could have an effect on my nursing son. Do I seriously have to be my own freaking doctor? Well, yes!
okay… done… phew!
TheFeministBreeder’s last blog post..Motherhood, Career, and Feelings of Worthlessness
@ Amber – I know what you mean about not wanting to drink and breastfeed in front of people. It’s like going to a bar when you’re pregnant (and not drinking). You feel everyone is judging you even though you know you’re not doing anything wrong, but you just don’t feel like having to explain yourself.
@Anji – I always wondered how Europeans viewed drinking alcohol while pregnant since everyone is so lenient there on age, etc. Very interesting cultural differences. I wonder how high the rate of FAS is? Do you have any idea on that? Would love to know.
@Debbie – You’re right about tkaing into consideration all those factors. Right again about it being too technical to figure out for most. I say err on the side of caution. Other people say buy one of those new gadgets to do the work for you. Whatever works for the individual I guess!
@TheFeministBreeder – Holy cripes! Doctors really annoy me. Sure there are a few really great ones out there. I don’t dispute they do exist, but in general, I think they suck. There was a time I held them in such high esteem and thought you had to be soooo smart to ever be a doctor. Now I think I’m a far better doctor than most of the GPs I have seen. I go in, get their opinion, take their prescription and then go home and do my own research before I fill it or do anything else. You really do have to be your own doctor these days I think. For safety reasons if nothing else. It is absolutely ridiculous!
@Pretty Sprinkles, @Melissa and @Emily – I love that you choose to keep your bodies as healthy as possible. I did that for the first yeaar or so with my first baby, but I was always feeling pretty resentful of friends and family enjoying a drink without me and enjoying decadant desserts and even an occasional bag of chips. I’m not too into processed junk foods as it is but an occasional glass of wine and especially dessert are things I feel I *need* to have once in awhile. Once I realized these things wouldn’t actually harm my baby through my breastmilk I felt so much better about being able to treat myself, but I can relate to both of you. I am usually pretty hard on myself about what I put into my body.
@Rashel – Very good point about food allergies. There’s a post in there for me for the future! Thanks for bringing that up.
@Everyone else – Thanks for leaving a comment! They are so appreciated!
I drank the occasional coffee and even had a half glass of wine here and there while pregnant (what can I say, we were in Europe, where opinions on all this are much more relaxed than the US). But after he was born I was much more worried about caffeine… mainly b/c I didn’t want to deal with a wide-awake baby! Eventually I relaxed, though, and though I tried not to, say, down a glass of wine right before nursing, I wasn’t too strict about it, either, and had coffee/alcohol from time to time. The kiddo seems to be ok for it. ; )
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So I just read a few comments up and have to put in my 2cents about doctors and medicine… I think doctors deserve their respect, they went through eons of med school, etc. However, we seem to expect them to be Gods and know everything, all the time, and always warn us of exactly what we need to know, and never ever make mistakes. Which is ridiculous. Especially when you look at the schedules doctors have to keep and how much they work, and I mean I know I’m a mess when sleep deprived, how could my doctor not be??? In short, I think they are an authority on medical issues and their opinion should be respected, but it is also up to each of us to watch our own backs and make sure that doctor’s orders make sense to us. I don’t see the sense in blindly following everything your dr says, NOR deciding drs are evil and should be ignored. They’re there for a reason and know a heck of a lot more than we do in most medical matters, but we also have the responsibility to ourselves to take our own health matters into our own hands.
*stepping off soap box now, thank you*
Marcy’s last blog post..Our own little Mister Fantastic
Interesting comments so far! I too, would like to know what practices are like in Europe around drinking while pregnant/breastfeeding and what the incidence of FAS is.
I didn’t drink at all during my first & second trimester, but I did have the occasional half glass of wine during my third. When I have a drink now, I make sure I am only poured about a half a glass, and I probably have my half-glass once a week, sometimes twice depending on what’s going on. I would NEVER drink to excess while pg or nursing, and I honestly don’t think I’ve ever even got much of a buzz off my half-glass of wine, especially since I’m generally eating while I’m drinking it. I saw a study a bit ago that said that the percentage of alcohol in your milk is the same as that in your blood, so if you look at a standard drink raising your blood alcohol level to 0.02 – 0.05%? I’m not concerned about that much!!!
I did avoid caffeine through most of my pregnancy and for the first few months while nursing. Now, I try to keep my intake to two cups or less of caffeinated beverages per day.
As for other things, I try to take my vitamins and supplements and we eat a mostly organic, whole foods diet. I think the hormones in meats and dairy products as well as pesticides and GMOs are much more concerning than the occasional glass of wine!!
Kim’s last blog post..Guacamole Recipe
I am only strict with some things because I have to be for the sake of the baby. I am dairy-free (nearly a year now)because dairy was causing a lot of issues with the bubs. Once I cut that out he was much better. I have my wine sometimes occasionally, sometimes more. Rarely more than 1 glass anyhow. I try to plan it so he won’t be nursing right away, but when on demand that doesn’t always work. I drink coke or tea or coffee, I just try to not have any in the evening because sometimes it seems to jack the baby up too. Other than that I just try to eat healthy but shouldn’t we do that anyhow.
One of the commenters (Anji) did some quick research to see if there is any difference between FAS in the UK and the US. Here is what she sent me. Thanks again Anji!
“From a quick search I found:
FAS occurs in 1-2 in every thousand livebirths in the USA yearly, and FAE (Fetal Alcohol Effects (a less severe set of alcohol-related abnormalities) in 3-5.
FAS occurs in 1-3 in every thousand live births in the UK yearly.
I couldn’t find stats on FAE in the UK. I’m not sure if we differentiate between FAS and FAE or whether we use FAS to describe anything falling under the FAS spectrum. If we do differentiate, I’d imagine the stats are similar to the USA’s based on the similarity between the FAS statistics.
I know that even though Americans are told “no alcohol in pregnancy ever” and we are told “Drink in moderation is okay but no binge drinking ever” there will always be women who for one reason or another decide to drink to excess, which to me explains the similarity in the stats.
What’s interesting is that the FAS rate is practically the same as the US, even though we keep being told “British women are the heaviest drinkers in the world” and all that jazz.”
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I always stuck to the rule of thumb: “If you’re sober enough to drive, you’re sober enough to nurse.” So basically, although I enjoy a glass of wine or beer quite often, I never drink so much that I couldn’t responsibly drive a car. Basically, whether it’s coffee or alcohol, I listen to my body and do what feels right and within the limits of healthy living.
@Marcy – Thanks so much for your comment. What you say is very true about doctors. Society does have an expectation that they can fix anything and everything that goes wrong with our bodies and answer our questions about health on a dime, etc. But society also assumes every plumber who comes to fix their toilet will know exactly what’s wrong with it and every painter will not drop a speck of paint on their carpet. We expect people of all trades to be excellent at their trade, but the truth is everyone is human and we all make mistakes. What bothers me about doctors is when they act as though they know everything. I have more respect for the doctors who say they are going to consult with a collegue or a book, or that the information they are giving me comes from such-and-such source. I think everyone should do their own research when it comes to their own health or their children’s because so much is at stake. And each doctor is different. I don’t think they are evil and not worth my time. I go to them to get the basics, but it is interesting that most the time I have an idea of what the problem is, I am right.
Basically I agree with everything you said. It was a very well-balanced comment. Thank you!
My motto is: In moderation. I don’t drink caffeine or soda in general, so that’s not tough to elminate. Nor do I ever take any pills to cure a headache or a cold, etc. Since I do enjoy drinking alcohol, eating sushi, chocolate, and ____, I didn’t want to resent nursing just so I could get back to doing the things I love. I admire the mothers who are strict on themselves and cut out what they enjoy doing at the sake of their child. Kuddos to them, and the rest of us who breastfeed.