Many new parents want to know when it’s the best time to introduce a bottle. Why? So dad can feed the baby and get to bond with the baby too. While this sounds like a great idea to new moms who want to share the responsibilities of having a new baby with their eager partner and get out and about once in awhile, this isn’t as perfect a situation as it sounds and can lead to breastfeeding problems.
Why? Because bottle feeding can be a slippery slope. Some babies learn to prefer the rapid entry of the milk from the bottle over the slower intake of milk from the breast. Introducing a bottle and then relying on it often can result in milk supply issues. If you don’t want your baby to prefer the bottle over you, why chance it? If this happens then you might find that you are pumping more than breastfeeding. Pumping is hard work and can become frustrating when it is something you have to do to ensure your baby continues to receive your breast milk. Some moms will decide it’s easier to switch to formula. That means your best laid breastfeeding plans just got flushed down the toilet. All because of an innocent and well meaning decision to share one bond worthy activity with your partner.
Moms who don’t have to return to work and who plan on breastfeeding exclusively for the first six months don’t need to pump. In fact, many moms who are at home and do pump find it is more trouble than it’s worth. Finding the time to pump when you’re already nursing around the clock? I did it once. It took three days of finding precious spare moments to fill a bottle and then at 8 weeks on the nose I watched while my hubby fed our daughter and in two minutes the whole ordeal was over. He thought it was neat but neither one of us thought it was the be-all-end-all of a dady-daughter-bonding-moment. Thankfully we both recognized it as a hassle. So how can dads bond with their breastfeeding baby? There are many ways and you don’t have to have boobs to do it.
1. Bathe the baby.
Bathing babies is a gorgeously intimate activity dads can do to instill trust in their tiny slippery infants. Watch the eye contact and gurgling smiles baby gives to dad as he sponges and talks and sings to his little one.
2. Change the diapers.
This is a perfect opportunity to play this little piggie and make silly faces then lift up a clean baby up for big papa bear hugs.
3. Rock the baby.
Everyone has the token photo of baby and daddy asleep on the couch, right? Daddies have wonderful deep throaty voices that can lull many a tired and cranky baby with their humming. Their strong arms can often carry babies longer than mom’s too (okay, okay, I speak for myself here!). Alternatively, if the baby doesn’t need to be breastfed to sleep, dad can go and lie down with the little one. Taking in the smell of dad, like mom, is an important bonding mechanism for babies.
4. Carry the baby in a sling.
This is just about as close as dad can get mimicking the closeness that moms have with their babies against their chests. Dads can take the baby for a walk while mom gets that “me-time” outing she needs. Little ones learn so much from seeing the world up high in a baby carrier. Just tell him he can take the baby to the hardware store and show him all the neat tools this way, thus preparing him early for manhood!
5. Skin-to-skin contact at birth.
After baby is born and mom is taking a shower or getting sewn up dads can carry the baby skin-to-skin against their chest. Again the smell and familiar womby sound of dad’s voice gets reinforced. Babies learn that this guy is one of my people. This is my dad.
Happy Father’s Day to all the dads of breastfeeding babies. The support you give your partner to breastfeed your baby just may be the best support of all.
What does/did your husband do to bond with the baby? Dads, what is your favorite way of bonding?
Related posts:
- Breastfeeding An Adopted Baby: One Mom’s Story
- Breastfeeding Nature’s Way
- When To Send Your Nursling on an Overnight
- Why Nighttime Breastfeeding and Bed Sharing Is So Important
- Monday Musings: Is It Okay To Advertise Baby Bottles To Pumping Moms?
Tags: bonding, bottle feeding, dads
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We attempted pumping, more for me to give my sore nipples a break, than bonding for my husband. It was a PITA. I resented having to pump, but resented my sore nipples more so I did it. Once I was over the pain and our latch was correct, I stopped pumping. I hardly pump now, and if I do it is to get milk for making baby food. My son has lost any knowledge he ever had of how to use a bottle. This has been a bit problematic for us since I have no opportunity to leave my son for more than 2 hours. I don’t think bottles are evil, but I know for some people it harms their success.
But bottle feedings aren’t really bonding material. My hubby likes laying on the bed with our son and entertaining him.
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my husband did a lot
and i dedicated a post for him for father’s day! honestly, i wouldn’t have made it without him
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