Today I took a mental health day – literally! I went to work! No, not my daycare job sillies, back to my old mental health job. It sucked dragging my butt out of bed at 5:30 am, gently unlatching my toddler’s mouth from my breast where she’d been stuck most of the night, subconsciously aware that I would be leaving her in the morning, and driving myself for an hour down a dark highway in the pouring rain, in a very unrested haze, not helped at all by my music selection – “the Grapes of Wrath,” a melancholy male pop/rock band I favoured in the early 1990′s. But it fit the day’s theme of nostalgia beckoning back to an easier time, the freedom of being an unencumbered young woman full of idealism and enthusiasm, plundering ahead, impatiently navigating through the traffic, moving towards shining goals.
My old worksite hasn’t changed much since I worked there full time over five years ago. The clients, of course, have come and gone and been replaced by new ones, young adults in the early stages of a major mental illness, needing mental, emotional, pscyho-social, medical and spiritual support to help them with the life skills and education they will need to recover from this heart wrenching life setback. Most of these men and women have been newly diagnosed with schizophrenia and/or bipolar disorder and a high percentage of them have concurrent disorders, usually addictions. While each of these individuals has a unique set of problems, the work is satisfyingly the same: Be compassionate, give hope, teach skills, be patient, kind, respectful and genuine, listen, don’t judge, partner with the clients to help them achieve their goals. In short, inspire hope for wellness.
I love this work. It isn’t even work to me. It’s just giving my best to others who need it. However, I don’t love the way I see things heading in this field. Despite the evidence and best practices guidelines, the most influential mental health professionals still appear to be working under a model at least 20 years outgrown. A large part of this, of course, is the fault of our current government that is taking money out of social programs, forcing cutbacks in staffing and reducing the ability to give the kind of care required for recovery. And this takes its toll on staff, and management too, who are forced to make the decisions as to where and what to cut, resulting, unfortunately, in negative attitudes and hopelessness, which permeates through the system, affecting everyone in its path.
Maybe it’s because I was only in mental health for five years and was just starting to feel the impact of these barriers, but still feeling like I could make big changes when I got pregnant and left. Maybe because I’ve been away so long and haven’t watched the system further deteriorate (like my husband has who is still in this field – we met at work), that I still have hope, idealism and passion to affect change. Whatever it is, I’m excited that I’m applying for my Masters in Social Work so I can go back into the mental health field and start affecting that change.
So my day off from the kids was a good one. I went back into my element – the other side of my identity, and while I didn’t do much in the way of affecting much positive change in anyone’s life in the eight hours I was there, I had time to reflect on my future and imagine the changes I will make. Ah, time. I had more time on my hands at work today than I ever have at home, even on a weekend. I had time to read my book and watch tv before the clients woke up (something I virtually never do!). I had time to read mental health related journal articles and focus down my entrance essay topic. And after work, I got time to visit my old roommate and maid of honour at my wedding, a friend only an hour away but whom I see only twice a year now if I’m lucky. Did I mentioned I got paid to do all this? Yes, it was great to take a mental health day.
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Tags: addictions, affecting change, idealism, mental health, nostalgia
Thanks for sharing this. It helps to return to what we used to do if only to remind us where we are going next.
Hi Melodie,
Awesome post! As a mental health counselor and mom, I relate to oh-so-many of the sentiments you expressed. From my M.A. intern days in the psychiatric hospital in the 90′s to the reduced funding-inspired-changes in community mental health today, there are SO many changes I’d like to see happen. Some moments I shake my head in frustration. Others, I am just incredibly grateful to be able to be present with a client, sharing authentic I – Thou moments. Thanks also for pointing out the LOL comment that you have more time on your hands at work than you ever do at home! So true
@Capital mom – True words of wisdom! Thank you!
@Christy – Thanks so much for your comment. If anything it is always great to meet other moms in the same line of work who identify with what you are saying.
Melodie- you are a shining star and this is by far the nicest thing I’ve read today! You are a wonderful example and inlfuence and I’m looking forward to hearing about your endeavours!
Congratulations!
I’m glad that you were able to take this day, and that it provided you with some clarity. And yes, I totally found that I had more time on my hands at work than I ever did at home with small children. It’s a different kind of busy, being at the continual beck and call of little people, that’s for sure.
Hey Mel,
You might enjoy these books:
Wolf, Naomi. Misconceptions, Truth, Lies, and the Unexpected On the Journey To Motherhood.
Anchor Books: New York, USA, 2003.
Cowan, Shannon Cowan, Fiona Tinwei Lam, Cathy Stonehouse. Ed. Double Lives, Writing and
Motherhood. Kingston, ON: McGill-Qeen’s University Press, 2008
Jenn
p.s. I was listening to Grapes of Wrath the other day too!
I remember listening to Grapes of Wrath too. My mom was a social worker (MSW) and definitely made a difference in the lives of so many of her clients. Keep strong to your belief that one person really can make a difference. We each do this in our own way and contribute to the healing of the world.