Before I became a mother, I didn’t know how long I would breastfeed. Before the birth of my first daughter I thought that I would return to work immediately following a year long maternity leave, so I guess I pictured breastfeeding until she turned one. But when she turned one I knew that we would not stop that year. Breastfeeding was very important to her, and to me. She breastfed until the eve of her third birthday.
I’m not positive I practiced child-led weaning perfectly, but I do feel good about how we did it. The process of weaning happened gently and feedings tapered off very slowly. We talked about it for the few months leading up to her birthday and she agreed that she would stop when she turned three. I was tandem nursing at the time and suddenly my oldest daughter looked very big against my breast next to her infant sister. I was also starting to feel physiologically uncomfortable nursing her – in highly medical terms I had the “heebeejeebees.” However, even after the official last nursing session, we did have a few more, when situations arose that called for it and when nothing else would do. But the days grew longer in between those “special occasion” times and soon she had forgotten had to do it.
Is she too old to breastfeed?
My second daughter enjoyed nursing as a baby, but not nearly as much as her sister did. When she was a small baby I assumed she would wean herself early – definitely by the age of two. Now as a toddler and almost a pre-schooler, she has proven me wrong. She lurves it. And since she is my last child I am not feeling rushed or “heebeejeebeeish” about needing to wean her so we will likely continue past her third birthday.
I will be a rarity among breastfeeding mothers and breastfeed a three year old. But will I breastfeed a four year old? Hm. Honestly, the thought right now of me breastfeeding a four year old makes me uncomfortable. Why? Well, I think this is as far as I can imagine because it is as far as I have been personally exposed to breastfeeding an older child. I have a couple friends who nursed their children until they turned four so it feels like it is within my realm of “normal.” Older than four I can wrap my head around a little bit, but it’s harder. I support breastfeeding older children, but for me, there is a limit to as far as I can go. I think… At least there is right now…
Is she too old to breastfeed?
While recently reading Breastfeeding Older Children by Ann Sinnott, which I will be posting a review of on March 10th, it sounds as though I am not alone.
“Many, surprised that eight year olds are breastfed will be shocked at [the] more advanced ages; and will no doubt be aghast to hear that in the industrialized world today children ages nine, ten and eleven years (and maybe older) have or are breastfeeding. Other mothers also draw up at older ages. Those breastfeeding four and five year olds look suspiciously at those feeding children aged six and older, and even those breastfeeding six, seven and eight year olds may look askance at the upper ages. It’s not surprising that sustained breastfeeding drops at four years and plummets after five. In part this reflects societal pressure but it also probably reflects under -reporting.”
Although these higher ages are completely different than what we are used to hearing about, how is this scenario much different from the mom who assumes she will breastfeed only until her baby gets teeth, or crawls, or walks or turns one or asks for it by name, and then keeps on going, realizing that her beliefs were nothing more than prejudice or cultural assumptions? Who realizes only upon having a child of her own that breastfeeding can be a mutual rewarding practice? That it isn’t sexually deviant and that she certainly isn’t emotionally unbalanced for doing so (even if other people think she is)?
But what I find most interesting about this topic is, don’t many of us have pre-conceived notions about ages that are too old to breastfeed? Don’t many of us feel uncomfortable hearing about certain ages of children being breastfed? Or maybe not hearing about, but what if we were witness to it? Whether it’s two years old or eight years old, for right or for wrong, don’t we all have a limit? Even while we ourselves are breastfeeding older babies or toddlers?
What do you think?
And don’t forget to stay tuned this week for my review of Breastfeeding Older Children.
Related posts:
- Book Review: Breastfeeding Older Children
- Long Term Breastfeeding Moms: Are We Damaging Our Kids?
- The Pros and Cons of Breastfeeding a Toddler
- Breastfeeding A Toddler During Pregnancy
- Extended Breastfeeding: Melissa’s Story
Tags: breastfeeding older children, child-led weaning, Tandem Nursing
Posted by Melodie Breastfeeding General, Breastfeeding Toddler, Tandem Nursing Subscribe to RSS feed
I personally am not comfortable past the age of 2 or so only because they are already vocal and little people.
But I am aware that it may just be my upbringing and that if I lived in Africa I may not even see an issue with it.
So why for me personally it does give me the heebeejeebeees (so that’s how you spell it lol), it is not my decision to make-it is your and your husband’s. And I have no right to be judgmental about it, so I won’t be. People in this world do need to learn how to respect other people’s parenting choices (as long as we are not talking abuse of course which this is most definitely not the case).
Good luck!
Susie´s last blog ..Document Your Parents & Grandparents Life Story Before It Is Too Late
I meant while for me not why for me
Susie´s last blog ..Document Your Parents & Grandparents Life Story Before It Is Too Late
My LO is currently 2 years, 8 months and 2 weeks old (per Lilypie). I thought that I would wean her at 1yr, since I thought after that I would get the heebeejeebeees. Currently I am taking it one day at a time. Reading the post I got the heebeejeebeees when reading about 8 year olds nursing. So I guess I have opened up my mind a lot about nursing
My LO will let me know when she is ready to wean, hopefully sometime before she goes off to college *LOL*
My goal was to reach age 2 then stop. Naima is now 2 years and 3 months and it is easier to give in when she asks to nurse than listen to her cry, whine – especially at night! may i can until she is 3 but beyond that, as of this moment, i don’t think i can continue to nurse until 4!
Jenny´s last blog ..Free Breastfeeding Class
In general, I’d say it does depend greatly on the culture and the family in question. Because of the oversexualization in the US, I think past 5 is heebie-jeebie (well, and the only mom I’ve ever met who was nursing a 5yo was offering it out of a weird bribery/codependency/guilt thing, as in “stop that now and I’ll let you nurse” and anytime that child had a tantrum she’d drop everything, including the younger one, to nurse), though I would definitely see exceptions for special needs kids.
So my guidelines are the age of modesty (the true one, not the one 2yos sometimes go through), the age when the family feels it’s inappropriate to bathe with an opposite sex child, and the age when it’s no longer ok to take your opposite sex child into the public restroom with you (I’m starting to feel that now with my 5yo though letting him in the men’s room alone is another set of heebie-jeebies).
Nursing may not be sexual, but as the child grows and begins to become more aware of their sexual feelings, I do see potential for potential (lacking a better word) confusion in a society where breasts are highly sexualized.
In other words, when there’s lingerie marketed at 8yos who watch the Disney Channel, nursing an 8yo is definitely heebie-jeebie material. Nursing to puberty? I can’t even comprehend. Not to say I’m judging, just that it’s beyond anything I can relate to.
When I decided to give breastfeeding a try, I said “just to 6 months”. At 6 months I said “just until he starts biting me.” After he bit me, I said “just until he can ask for it.” Now at 11 months he knows the sign for milk and asks all the time but we are nowhere near stopping. My goal is to nurse until the next currently unconcieved baby comes along but even after that I could change my mind. I feel like once a kid is old enough to realize breastfeeding sets them apart from all their friends they’re too old. I don want nursing to be something they are ashamed to tall about and kids in kindergarten could easily make it so.
I am nursing my 31 month old and 35 weeks prego. I will be fine nursing her until 3 … maybe 4? It’s hard to say now because I never imagined nursing her being this verbal. As far as others nursing till 8….good for them! I wouldn’t do it that old, but I’m not judging others who are ok with it.
All mine weaned themselves, one at 15 months, girls at exactly a year but the last one was very happy feeding at 25months! I felt quite comfortable feeding him but external pressure meant I had to stop…I wish I’d stuck to my guns over that one. I cannot imagine feeding older than a 3 yr old though but each to their own.
I only nursed my first 2 for about 4 months each I was young and so uninformed (one thing that would be awesome if it could be changed) but are tandem nursing my 31month old and 8 month old. When my toddler was born I knew I wanted to nurse until at least a year and then doing tons of research and being apart of nursing support groups I have decided to nurse for as long as she wants. I never would have imagined nursing through a pregnancy or even nursing a toddler but thats just how things are working for our family. I do not plan on setting limits for either one of them to stop,we will just have to see how it goes right now I see no end in sight but the average age for a child to self wean is about 5 so we will see. As for mothers who nurse 8, 9, 10 year olds I honestly think that it should be up to the mother and child to figure out what best and comfortable for them and that outsiders should not judge if it is continued mutually but I think at that point it should be when the child asks and not offered as a bribe.
Both of my daughters have weaned at around 3.5 years. One totally on her own, and the other on her own with a push from me in that direction. When you are “in the trenches”, so to speak, looking at your child day to day, I didn’t come across any one day where I could say with honesty: Today she is too old, but yesterday she wasn’t.
I don’t have an age that I would impose on society. I really do think it is a private decision between a mom and her child. For myself and my nurslings, I also don’t have an age in particular in mind. But I think there can be a point in time at which it doesn’t feel right anymore. With my current nursling (almost 3), I am feeling done. I think she is done too, but doing it more out of habit and certainly out of peer pressure (any nursing child in the room and she asks too). But I really don’t think it feels weird because of her age in particular, but just because neither of us seems that into it anymore.
Annie @ PhD in Parenting´s last blog ..What should we say instead?
Before I had my son I thought a year was a long time to nurse but I wanted to give it a try. I thought that nursing past 2 was weird and it would give me the creeps. Now that I’m doing it and learning all about it? That’s gone away. I still think 4 or 5 is too long for me personally, but 2 or 3? No prob!
Doing it myself totally changed my perspective. It seems like one of those things that you have to do it to understand sometimes. At this point I can’t imagine stopping at only a year.
the Grumbles´s last blog ..six months old!
The thing is, you don’t start nursing a 3 year old.. they get older day by day. I have known many kids (including two of my own) to nurse to 4, 5 or 6 and only one or two to nurse to 8 or 9. One was special needs and another it was a strange codependent relationship. There probably are happy, healthy nursing pairs out there of that age, though.
Mine forget when they weaned.. they remember nursing and enjoying it but don’t remember how old they were when they stopped. It was so gradual in one case, neither of us noticed when the nursing relationship was over; in the other case, it was a snap decision
on the child’s part and we only nursed once or twice more.
I wouldn’t have pictured myself as a tandem nursing mom, but my two are 12 months apart, so I am. My older nurseling is almost two. I don’t know when we’ll wean. But I do know that I will not nurse two through pregnancy.
I wouldn’t nurse past five, personally. (I don’t think.)
Natalie´s last blog ..Speaking of Podaegis
radmama, I like what you say about not starting out nursing a 3 year old. I am currently nusring an 11 month old and I can see nursing her until 2 yrs, but I’m not sure after that. I have a couple of friends who nursed their babies until 3 yrs so that doesn’t seem very weird to me. However, I was kind of shocked when a friend of my husband matter-of-factly said he breastfed until 7 yrs old. He’s from Nigeria so I asked my husband if that was common there. My husband said not usually past 4 yrs or so, so I was really surprised at how the friend had no qualms about sharing that information.
I thought that nursing a toddler was weird … until I became a mom
I’m currently tandem nursing my newborn and 21-month-old toddler. From where I sit now, I *hope* my daughter weans by 3, but I’m not saying I’ll wean her by then if she isn’t. Like a PP said, they get older day by day – so even though I can’t imagine nursing past 3, there was certainly a time when I didn’t think I’d ever nurse past 2 and I know I’ll be doing that 
Nursing until 7 or 8? I feel like that, in our current culture, is too old. Maybe not in other cultures, but in ours, that seems very … mature. Some girls are getting their periods at 8, for goodness sake! LOL
Again, though, I would never judge anyone for meeting a child’s *need* in that area, although I might question whether a child of 7 or 8 has a need to nurse or if something else is going on.
Kim´s last blog ..Tandem nursing – the early experiences
Make the choice that is right for you and your baby! I would never judge anyone for how long they decide to nurse, even if I had planned to stop before then. Nursing older kids will only stop being taboo if we stop judging people for it. People keep saying it’s not ok in “our culture”…but why not? We get to decide what is ok in our culture and what is not.
Alexandra´s last blog ..Boogers?
I knew I wanted to nurse for at least a year. But it was so obvious to me that my son still needed to nurse (and so did I) past that age. It felt so normal and right to me to keep going. By the time he was 21-22 months old I was exhausted though. I wanted my breasts back. He was only nursing a few times each day and becoming very vocal. He was a little person. I hired a lactation consultant to help me gently wean him off those last few sessions. It took about 2 1/2 months and then my husband and I had to come to London to find a house. My son was in a cast for a fractured tibia so we didn’t bring him along. Those 5 days sealed the weaning. He was 2 weeks past his 2nd birthday. He asked to nurse a few times when we returned. I let him try – but told him there was no milk left because he had so many teeth now and was eating and that mommy would hold him and kiss and cuddle him for comfort now. I wish I could have gone longer and let him lead the weaning. But honestly, I look at my son now and he is such a smart, verbal little person. He was reciting the ENTIRE “Night Before Christmas” clearly, at 28 months old and never sucked his thumb or pacifier. He seems so grown up to me that I can’t imagine him still nursing and he won’t be 3 until July. Maybe another child would be different. I mean, they are all different and have different needs, right? One size doesn’t fit all For child or mom)
Pure Mothers´s last blog ..One Burnt-Out Green Mama
I have no judgment and agree it’s best left to families to decide.
I remember when I first had a small infant Mothering had an article and they showed a picture of a 4-5 year old boy nursing. I was so uncomfortable with it and even more uncomfortable with my realization that I was uncomfortable with it.
I went on to nurse my oldest until the eve of his fourth birthday. He still asks every now and again and when I ask him why he says things like, “Your milk is the sweetest” and “It tastes like love”. sigh
I encouraged stopping b/c it was very uncomfortable and I had the heebeejeebies and I felt like it was a normal biological response that I needed to follow (I was nursing another baby too).
I’m now nursing my 2.5 year old and pregnant. It’s very uncomfortable so I’ve been cutting back a lot, as gently as possible. I figure once the baby comes and the soreness disappears I will offer again.
In defense of much older nurslings, I happen to live in a very pro-bfing community and I’m always shocked to hear how many nursed until 6-7. It’s never apparent and only when a mom makes a comment do you know. The half-dozen I know about personally are all super independent amazingly awesome kids in great families.
I breastfed my first child until she was 34 months. I was newly pregnant when she finally weaned, and nursing was uncomfortable. I wouldn’t say we did child-led weaning perfectly, either, but I am comfortable with how it happened. It was gentle, gradual and it took into account both her needs and mine.
I will say that there was a point in our nursing relationship when I got the ‘heebeejeebees’. Honestly, I even feel it occasionally now with my 19-month-old, when he wants to nurse a lot and fidget and play with my mole and so on. I will occasionally reach that point where I just want this kid OFF OF ME at all costs. I am far from ready to wean him and that feeling is still rare, but I can see how it will grow and eventually I won’t want to do this anymore.
I think that this feeling of not wanting to breastfeed anymore is normal, as is the feeling that there maybe IS an age that’s too old. I don’t think I would set an arbitrary limit, but I will admit surprise at hearing that some children who are well into the school-aged years are breastfeeding. Although I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it as long as it’s working for both mother and child, it’s outside of my comfort zone for sure. And that’s OK – no one’s saying that I have to breastfeed my 8-year-old.
Amber´s last blog ..Play Dough Disaster and Redemption
I nursed my first two children until they self-weaned, both around 3.5 years and assumed my third child would do around the same. But, he turned four in January and still nurses about once a day or so. Sometimes he skips a day or two and sometimes he nurses a few more times in a single day, especially when he’s a little bit sick, like today. I never really intended to breastfeed a four year-old, but what can I say, he just keeps getting older.
Is there an age when he’s too old? Not sure. One day at a time for us. I’m pretty sure he’ll be done sometime this calendar year. And like Amber above, I have moments when I just want this kid off of me for sure. But, most times, there’s no real rush. I’ll check back if he’s still nursing in a year.
Jacquie @ Wild Mother Arts´s last blog ..Moonwise Monday: Washable Menstrual Pads…
I couldn’t possibly add anything else to the child borne wisdom of moms in the trenches. I’ve had 6 bf’d kids, but none has gone past 3. Most have weaned themselves after about 15 months much to my disappointment, but since they were happy, I was ok with it. Until my last one weaned and I realized, this is it. I will never again know the utter joy of giving sustainence to a little pair of oving eyes gazing back at me.
I guess what I’m trying to say is, it’s a codependent releationship at any age. So 1, 3, 6, who’s to say what’s “healthy” and what’s not. You need each other in this and many other ways, and it’s up to the mother/baby pair to figure out when the right time is to move on to the next phase of your relationship.
Love, me lol.
Audrey´s last blog ..Leather Baby Boots Shoes 0 to 6 Month
errr, loving, not “oving”.
Audrey´s last blog ..Leather Baby Boots Shoes 0 to 6 Month
I am hoping to have lots of kids, and I don’t see how it’d be possible to nurse more than 2 at a time, so I can’t imagine any of then nursing past 4 or 5. If I have a newborn and kids who are 2,4,6, & 8 someday (not that they HAVE to be that close together), there’s no way I could nurse more than just the youngest one or two!
Also, I agree about the kindergarten point made by Suzane earlier. I think that it may not be fair or right, but a nursing school-age kiddo would probably be mocked or demeaned by his peers or even a teacher. I could even picture some teachers recommending a kid be sent to the counselor to make sure it wasn’t an unhealthy relationship. Homeschooling would obviously avoid that problem though!
Maman A Droit´s last blog ..Insights on VBACs: Exclusive Interview
I think it might be helpful to realize that nursing an older child is sometimes (usually) very different than nursing a younger child. I would have never known friends who had older nurslings unless they told me. It seems like it’s something that happens before bedtime or during quiet family times.
hillary´s last blog ..flowers13: good ques. RT @soozenw: What is a clinically adequate pelvis? #nihvbac
I was nervous when I saw there were 25 comments. Now I’m pleasantly surprised – 25 comments, no controversy, and all of them (I think) non-judgmental and open to the idea of older nurslings.
Melodie, you have a wonderful reader base
Personally? I used to be weirded out by older toddlers nursing, but that was before I had my own nursling. My local AP group has exposed me to children up to 5 nursing in front of me, and nursing 3 yr olds is so common I forget it’s not (outside of our group). I wouldn’t be surprised if our son nurses until he’s 4 or 5. Would I be comfortable beyond that? I don’t know – I agree with the PP who said “you don’t start nursing a 3 yr old.” It’s a day by day thing.
Dionna´s last blog ..Acknowledging Children’s Feelings
You really do have a fabulous readership. I was also concerned about negative comments. I’m currently tandem nursing my 3y7m and 1y6m and am 22w pregnant. I’ve nursed through 3 pregnancies now (one was a stillbirth) and each has been entirely different, just as both my nurslings are entirely different nursers. I am planning to tri-andem nurse once this new baby arrives. And will play it by ear depending on how we all do. We have limits set for my comfort that are acceptable to each of them. My 3yo is such a gentle nurser, and is much more attached to it than my far rougher 18mo. I am interested to see how long we go. If I am nursing a much older child, I think it will feel natural just like it has every day they have gotten older. As pp said, they get older every day.
I had never intended to nurse *less* than two years, but due to multiple pregnancy losses that seem to be influenced by nursing, I have decided that I need to wean my 21 mo by about 2, in favor of being able to have more children (I might not care yet, but I’m 33 and want at least 2 more) – and if I get pregnant in the meantime, we’ll go cold turkey, which I expect to be really rough on us both. It has not been an easy decision, and I blogged about it just today. I *think* I would have encouraged her to wean by three or so, but I just don’t know at this point.
Katie B.´s last blog ..Hard Choices
Olivia, the first time I saw a nursing 2-year-old, I was shocked. Now I will be sad if my current baby doesn’t nurse until at least 2. How things change!
I can only speak to what is right for me and my family.
I am pleased my mother stopped breastfeeding me at 6 months – though she could have gone a little longer. I am actually grateful that i don’t have memories of breastfeeding. That’s me and how I want to be.
But none-the-less if someone wants to breastfeed their 5 year old (which my sister intends on doing) then i’m fully supportive of this. In particular i’d like for them to feel they can do this in public too.
Like others have said, I don’t think there is a right age for society to say, “At this age, we stop nursing our children.” Different mom-child relationships evolve in different ways. Some have a need for nursing longer and some need it for a shorter time.
I noticed a couple people wondering if the nursing child would encounter trouble in school. My 4 year old is nursing once a day, and only the people that I tell know. If he were to go to preschool or kindergarten, I doubt anyone would even know unless I told them. I bet that there are actually more older nurslings out there than we know about because most people don’t share that information very readily.
Casey´s last blog ..Our Holiday Card
@Casey -Thanks for commenting on this. I’ll jump in here too.
This is also what I have found from reading the book and from a recent personal disclosure from someone that she was nurisng her 6 year old son but only before bed or under other special circumstances. She said other than immediate family (i.e., husband and other younger children) no one else knows. I think most people tend to keep this information to themselves because it is so private and there is so much fear around what people will say if they find out. And at age 5 and 6 kids can be good at keeping information private if you ask them to and explain why.
Melodie´s last blog ..Nachos and Guacamole
Wow… what a wonderful group of Nursing Mama’s ~ be proud of yourselves ladies, not only are you giving your babies the best start, but are keeping the nourishing liquid love flowing for toddlers & beyond. I think it is a very private choice of when to stop, which as many have said for each child it is different. With pressures from society, family, & friends, I applaud those who have helped pave the path to make this choice easier for those who choose to nurse longer.
I nursed my first until he was two & a half, & I was 8 months pregnant ~ despite the fact that my sister & best friend told me they would have an Intervention if he was still nursing at two… & my mother-in-law was quite upset that I continued nursing after six months… I felt alone, angry, & shocked that more people didn’t know the benefits of nursing! I then meet a friend that brought me to a LLL meeting. I was so relieved to find support for my natural instincts.
Along came baby number two & my 3 year old wanted to nurse again too. I allowed him to nurse, but he would only nurse for a short time, clearly happy to be close, he instantly smiled & seemed grateful for the closeness. The baby is now one & the oldest close to four, & he has the occasional pull, each time saying… mmmm that’s my favourite…. it totally melts me & makes me proud too.
I believe we still have a long way to go before nursing is an accepted normal occurrence in our western society, but one mama at a time is making a difference. I honour the choices that different families make, it’s their choice, their body, their lives… I say nurse on, do what’s right for you & your sweet lil’ babe (or big babe), follow your natural mothering instincts & don’t let the pressure of others dampen your power of choice!
I read somewhere that kids naturally wean at 4, so that’s the number I have had in mind. My son is 3 years and 2 months-ish and it’s slowing down for sure, but gradually. It seems like if we just let it go naturally, 4 will be around when we stop.
I think my goal originally was 1-2 years based on the WHO recommendations.
11 seems old, but every situation is different, for sure.
When my son was born I said I would go to 9mth, my husband asked me to consider 12 mths and then I figured I would go until he weaned himself. I was pleasently surprised at how well he nursed, how many problems nursing solved (i.e. tantrums, owies, sickness etc.)and now my boy has celebrated his 2nd b-day and I am 28 weeks pregnant w/ #2. He still nurses but I’ve noticed that sometimes he goes aslong as 4 or 5 days between “snacks”. I had planned to tandem nurse if that what he wants but he seems to be moving past this stage in his life. Thats fine, as long as he is happy and healthy, thats all I care about!
I nursed my daughter until she was 3.5. Like most, I originally planned “to give it my best shot”, then 6 months, then a year, then 18 months… and at that point stopped giving myself a timeline.
I did gently lead her to weaning at 3.5 to pursue long-delayed fertility treatment, and I’m not sure how much longer she would have nursed if I hadn’t. We were down to 3 minutes before bed at that point, and I was definitely feeling the heebeejeebies! I used the “there’s no milk left” excuse – now that her baby brother has arrived she has been asking if she can have Mama milk in a cup – if I ever feel up to setting up the pump, I’ll let her try.
I’m so saddened to see TV shows where mothers are subtly ridiculed for breastfeeding older children. While I don’t think I could have gone that long if I was feeling as I did at 3.5, I can’t see any harm in it as long as it’s mutually desired and doesn’t get in the way of normal development – from what I could see of those kids, it didn’t.
When I was pregnant my goal was just to nurse. After we made it through the first few weeks it was 1 yr. Well 1 came and went so the goal was 2 yrs since WHO recommended it. Yep, 2 came and went. We’re at 2.5 yrs with no changes since he was 10 mos. Some days its 3 times a day. Other days its a whole lot more. My new goal is to try to keep them accessible and follow child led weaning. Some days I’m ready for it to be over. I’m sore, I’m tired, I’m tired of being needed, and my hormones are “off”. Then I realize I’ll still be tired and needed whether nursing or not and in the grand scheme this is something very little and easy that I am able to do that means so much to us both physically and psychologically.
If you had asked me this question when he was a baby, I would have had an answer. I was weirded out by toddlers nursing. Now I don’t. He’s still my baby and like others have said, he’s not that much different today than he was yesterday. I am weirded out by older (6 and up?) kids nursing, but that may just be because I’m not there yet. I think we’ll be done by the time he’s 10 because I’m pretty sure he’ll be as tall as I am and I just can’t figure out the latch position for that one. lol
[...] There is so much I have learned and been inspired by. I feel like I have found a muse. For now, what do I think about breastfeeding older children? Well, let’s just say that with science and understanding the heebeejeebees are gone. And [...]
Another great post, Mel! I’m so glad to see the nice comments too.
I would like to echo my changing attitude on appropriate age. Probably if asked a few years ago, I would have said something uninformed like “until they’re old enough to ask for it” or similar. Now I’m nursing a 7 month old and dreading when she gives it up. So far, she’s showing no signs of weaning!
My other addition to the stream is to repeat something one of the IBCLCs I’ve seen told me: breastfeeding is a partnership. It needs to work for both partners, not just the nursling. So if nursing your whatever age child is making you crazy/sad/stressed, it’s probably time to wean. If it’s working for both of you, keep it up.
CaroLyn´s last blog ..A Quickie: Some of My Favourite Parenting Posts
I like what you said CaroLyn,
There was a big shift in our relationship (with my first) when I realized I was in a relationship! My feelings/instincts counted too and it wasn’t just about whatever he wanted 100% of the time. I was actually able to nurse longer and more compassionately after giving myself permission to consider my needs in the relationship.
hillary´s last blog ..flowers13: RT @PushforMidwives: #NIHVBAC So very glad that Barb Stratton forced panel to admit that document based on belief that women aren’t people.
Well now. I used to absolutely know how old was too old for breastfeeding — if they can talk, they’re too old. Mind you, that was before I actually ever breastfed or learned anything at all legit about it. Now that I’ve been breastfeeding for years, I have know stinking idea!
[...] depends on seeing breastfeeding in public, normalizing the practice of breastfeeding toddlers (even older children), and publicly speaking openly and positively about breastfeeding. And that’s what I’m [...]
I came into motherhood with the ideal of “child led weaning” in my mind. My husband wasn’t a fan, but as he saw how much the nursing relationship meant to my daughter and I he became VERY supportive. My daughter is now 27 months old and still nursing. I don’t think she’s too old, and I plan to tandem with her and our next (I am four months pregnant). I am struggling, though. Not with how old she is, but with how uncomfortable it is becoming. Sometimes I think she is biting me but she isn’t. It just hurts! Still, I can’t bear to end the relationship with her knowing that in just a few months she will look with longing as her sibling nurses.
Heather Dessinger´s last blog ..3 Day Potty Training With Lora Jensen: Day 2
My son is 26 months old, and only nurses 2-3 times a day, and relies on Mommy snuggles at night for comfort. Like many here, my initial goal was one year, then when we reached that, I decided to take it day by day. Like some other Moms, it is hard right now as I’m four months pregnant with #2, and it can sometimes be excruciatingly painful. Thankfully he is an understanding and sensitive little boy, and will gladly accept time on my lap with quite snuggle time if it is painful. The milk is also gone, but I hope when this second baby is born in September, if he is still interested the I will give tandem a try!